Bears on Babies, Installmoo 4: Halloween

Tomorrow Baby turns seven weeks. Which is perfect timing, because according to 3D Pregnancy, this means:

The skull is translucent, so the brain is visible.

Best. Halloween. Costume. Ever.

Bears on Babies, Installmoo 3: Heartboo

What has a heartbeat, but no heart?

A six week old baby.

What has a heart, but no heartbeat?

A vampire.

Which is Jenn having?

A baby.

At 6 weeks, Baby:

- Cannot be exposed to direct sunlight.

- Doesn't like garlic.

- Feeds on the life force of another.

OK Bye
Stompy and All the Bears

Bears on Babies, Installmoo 2: Morning Sickness

Jenn has been having morning sickness.

*many Bears hugs for Jenn*

The Bears think morning sickness is stoopid, and someone should put an end to it right awoo.

To help everyone understand morning sickness better, the Bears have researched primary sources to compile the best info available. According to Wikipoodioo:

There is insufficient evidence to pin down a single (or multiple) cause, but the leading theories for proximate causes include:

- An increase in the circulating level of the hormone estrogen. Estrogen levels may increase by up to a hundredfold during pregnancy.

- Low blood sugar during pregnancy.

- An increase in progesterone relaxes the muscles in the uterus, which prevents early childbirth, but may also relax the stomach and intestines, leading to excess stomach acids.

- An increase in human chorionic gonadotropin.

- An increase in sensitivity to odors, which overstimulates normal nausea triggers.

Daphne Rose blames morning sickness on the patriarchy, which forces women to conform to the phallogenic rhythms of artificial work and household schedules, rather than live in harmony with the natural rhythms of their pregnancy.

Sigmoond Freud says morning sickness is the result of the mother's loathing of her husband. The subconscious manifestation of this is a desire to abort the fetus through vomiting.

*much laughing of Bears*

That Sigmoond Freud says the funniest things. After he died, the world didn't see another stand-up comic of Freud's genius until Shecky Greene came along.

OK Bye
Stompy and all the Bears

Bears on Babies, Installment 1: Split Pea

As a publoo servoo, the Bears have decided to post helpful and interesting information about Baby's development, so everyone can play along at home with Jenn and Jim. This is Part 1 of "Bears on Babies," an ongoing series of informatoo posts on Baby.

At this point, Baby is about 5 weeks old. This means:

- Baby will be the size of a pea in about another week.

*much discussion of Bears*

- This means Baby is currently the size of a split pea.

- Baby has two layers of cells, which will develop into all of Baby's organs.

- Baby does not yet have a 'Merican Spress Card.

- We do believe Baby has internoo access, but at this point, only dial-up connectivity.

We will now try to MSN Baby.

The Bears: Hello, Baby! Can you read us?

Baby:

The Bears: Hello! Hello!

Baby:

There seem to still be some technical difficulties on Baby's side.

Hee!

Hee hee!

*much bouncing up and down of Aunt and Uncle Bears*