Wednesday, April 19, 2006

The Bears Call for a Bearcott of "Teddy Bear Review"

We Bears were thinking aboo writing some articles, and so we explored publicatoos aboo Bears. We were most disturbed when we found oo the editorioo policy of Teddy Bear Review. The Writer's Guidelines say:
We are not interested in articles that are purely sentimental or nostalgic or written from the bear’s point of view.

How can a magazine claim to be a review of Bears if it doesn't allow Bears to speak for themselves? This magazine is obviousloo an instrumoo of the Oroo Sloo Troo. A place that advocates the buying and selling of Bears, rafs, and look looks of all kinds. (And probabloo kitties, too.) A place where Bears and look looks are meant to be seen and not heard.

Therefore, we ask everyone to join us in bearcotting Teddy Bear Review:

Please feel free to post this symbol on your website or blog blog!

OK Solidaritoo

PS Thanks to Manuel for the great suggestion that this should be called a "Bearcott."

Saturday, April 08, 2006

What's your biggest fear?

Recentloo Spike the spawnkitty got oo of his house, and it was very scary for Leone and Jenn. So we've been thinking aboo what our biggoo foo is--being outside and alone like Spike, and all the humoos we try to get help from don't understoond we are animoo. And then we read this post by Gilliam, which talks aboo the same idea from a more philosophicoo perspectoo. It talks aboo the subjectoove natoo of realitoo, and how some humoos not recoognooze the independoo realitoo of Bears and look looks. Gilliam talks aboo the philosophoo of Hobbes, who sometimes writes Leviathan, sometimes is an inanimoo look look and sometimes is a man-sized flesh-n-blood tiger wearing a necktie.

We worry about getting lost, since so many humoos don't recoognooze our independoo realitoo. Our biggest fear is being with humoos, and we can't communicate, becoo they don't know we are animoo. That and falling over, becoo Bears don't have the most stable centers of gravity.

Our two biggest fears are falling over, and being with humoos and not being able to communicate. And the two are related--we don't want to fall over somewhere, and mayboo Jim doesn't notice, and walks off. And then suddenly, there we are, with humoos who don't recognize our independoo realitoo. And we quite clearly explain to them that we need to get home, and if they would just call Jim he would come and get us. But they wouldn't hear anything we say, becoo to them we would just be inanimoo objects.

Very scaroo.

What's you biggoo foo? Are you ever afroo humoos won't understoond you?

OK Bye

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Top Trivioo Toops Aboo the Bears

We got this link from Spike Spawnkitty and Callie, Sabre and Nova.

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Stompy!

  1. It is bad luck to walk under Stompy!
  2. The only planet that rotates on its side is Stompy.
  3. The deepest part of Stompy is over 35,000 feet deep.
  4. Stompy is often used in place of milk in food photography, because milk goes soggy more quickly than Stompy.
  5. When Stompy is swallowed, he will enter the blood stream within twenty minutes.
  6. If a snake is born with two heads, the heads will fight over who gets Stompy.
  7. Bananas don't grow on trees - they grow on Stompy.
  8. Stompy will often rub up against people to lay his scent and mark his territory.
  9. Some people in Malaysia bathe their babies in beer to protect them from Stompy.
  10. Stompy is physically incapable of sticking his tongue out.
I am interested in - do tell me about

Stompy: It's true. I can't stick out my tongue.

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Blinky!

  1. In the 1600s, tobacco was frequently prescribed to treat headaches, bad breath and Blinky!
  2. Banging your head against Blinky uses 150 calories an hour.
  3. Europe is the only continent that lacks Blinky.
  4. Grapes explode if you put them inside Blinky!
  5. The first domain name ever registered was
  6. The fingerprints of Blinky are virtually indistinguishable from those of humans, so much so that they could be confused at a crime scene.
  7. A lump of Blinky the size of a matchbox can be flattened into a sheet the size of a tennis court!
  8. Blinky is the sacred animal of Thailand.
  9. Blinky invented the wheel in the fourth millennium BC.
  10. Blinky is the only metal that is liquid at room temperature.
I am interested in - do tell me about

*much searching for Jim's 'Merican 'Spress Card by Blinky, so he can travel to Thailand*

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Calliope!

  1. Julius Caesar wore a laurel wreath to cover up Calliope!
  2. The Asteroid Belt between Mars and Jupiter is made entirely of Calliope.
  3. Fish travel in schools, but whales travel in Calliope!
  4. Birds do not sleep in Calliope, though they may rest in her from time to time.
  5. The international dialling code for Calliope is 672!
  6. Calliopeolatry is the mindless worship of Calliope!
  7. The first toy product ever advertised on television was Mr Calliope Head.
  8. Medieval knights put the skin of Calliope on their sword handles to improve the grip!
  9. The military salute is a motion that evolved from medieval times, when knights in armour raised their visors to reveal Calliope!
  10. The colour of Calliope is no indication of her spiciness, but size usually is!
I am interested in - do tell me about

Calliope: What the world needs is more Calliopeolatry.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Jim Drew a Bear

Yesterdoo, Jim drew this pictoo of a Bear.

We didn't know he could do that.

*much bouncing up and down of Bears*

OK Bye